I should have more faith in people. I used to put too much in people, and recently I found myself not giving people the benefit of the doubt when they are fully deserving of it. I was so stuck on the handful of people who did certain things to me that I'm not giving credit where credit is due.
I recently got a new phone and someone lost almost half of my phones numbers. I lost my most important ones, because I forgot that on my old phone I changed the settings for those numbers to be saved to the phone so I can change the ringtones for them. So I lost the numbers of the people who had special ringtones. With some of those people, when I realized I had to wait for them to text me so I could get their numbers due to the fact that I had no other way of contacting them I also realized that I'm the one who always texts them and that they never initiate conversation. So I assumed i'd just lose 2 or 3 those numbers for good. It was disappointing to realize that it seemed I was clinging to people who don't return the effort. I start that "story of my life" thinking. "Of course things are this way Leilani, it always will be, these people dont give a damnnnn about you, you're disposable".... Yeah well too bad I got I got a text from one of those people, just because they were in a sitatuation where they thought about me. Little surprises can change your whole outlook. These things happen sometimes and they make me feel horrible for not having more faith in them.
I'll tell you what I have completely lost faith in.... OTHER PEOPLE WHO CALL THEMSELVES "PROFESSIONALS" CUTTING MY HAIR! There was a HUGE poster in the salon of this girl wiht this hair cut that I wanted. It was clear as day. THIS CHICK GIVES ME A BOWL CUT THAT LOOKS NOTHINGGGGGGG like what I asked for. This somehow happens everytime. No matter who I go to, no matter what haircut I want, no matter how specific I am. There was one girl who cut it exactly like what I wanted and put a little extra stank on it so it would look better on me. She was AMAZING. and one day she up and left JC Penney salon and didn't tell NOOOOOOBODY. Ever since then I've been cursed. which is why Leilani is going to cut her own hair next time. When it grows out of this nightmare of a hairstyle. IM DOING IT MYSELF. I've already hit rock bottom with a straight up BOWLCUT. its not even LIKE a bowlcut it IS a bowlcut. So i'm 100% sure that there's nothing I could do that would be worse than this.